For Those That Suffer
A surge of electricity engulfs my brain and I am floating;
Numbness falls upon my tongue,
my arm is a wet noodle laid upon a bed of pins and needles.
I try with all my might to curl my toes, but the end result is frustrating and fruitless;
like I am blowing on hot soup.
Tears pour from my sockets and drown my face;
I beg my body for relief, only to have it mock me in return,
I am a prisoner trapped within the walls of my beating heart,
I am a prisoner trapped between numb lips and incoherent speech.
I tell myself my adrenal system is overloaded,
I tell myself no one has ever died from a panic attack.
Looking up at these hospital walls,
while a needle pierces my skin...
a monster I have created and sustained for way too long.
I must not let it consume me,
I must not let it control me,
I must not let it hinder me.