Actually, I Do Write Comedies


Jessica Shubert


There once was an excellent poet

Was it I, you ask? You know it!

You’ll see how I rhyme

With high regard to meter, verse, diction, structure, and rh—time

Because when you’re the best, you show it.


As it happens, the poet—yours truly—

Encountered a rhyme most unruly

And with valiant effort, ‘twas met

With the help of the Internet

Which smote it thusly: canaliculi!


Victorious, the poet—myself—

Sought enthronement on the highest bookshelf

But elf would not do

To make this rhyme true

So for prestige, she went with the near-sound of commonwealth.


Such formidable use of such words, you see,

Allows real poets to take these liberties

Comedians also know this well

Though that’s another story to tell

In which our heroine will jest, laugh and be merry—

Unless, of course, the joke is on me . . .